Review: Fortunately, the Milk…

By Neil Gaiman, illustrated by Chris Riddell

Bloomsbury, out now

The adventures of a pint of milk through multiple times and spaces…

Whoever thought it could be so hard just to go and get a pint of milk and bring it home so your kids can have cereal for their breakfast? Well, Neil Gaiman clearly, and he’s created one of his funniest works answering the question.

You could get very serious about this and discuss the influence of the movie The Usual Suspects, or its reworking of the old gag about there not being any elephants in Surrey – or you can just dive in and allow Gaiman’s surreal story to enfold you.

If you’re a parent/godparent/favourite uncle or aunt, chances are you’ve had to make up a tale for the children in your care at some point, and know that “I’m going to try to hit all the bases” feeling that this story embraces. If you’re not old enough to have children yet, then you’ll probably envy the kids in this story, whose father is able to come up with such a brilliant tale that jumps from time travelling dinosaurs to globby green aliens, pirates, the god Splod, and holes in the space-time continuum that will be explained later.

Gaiman’s prose is complemented wonderfully by Chris Riddell’s illustrations – the dad in question bears a distinct resemblance to the author, and there are cameo appearances by Miranda Richardson’s Queenie, some vampires of questionable heritage, piranhas, ponies and much more.

Verdict: Perfect reading at the end of a long day for children of all ages. Particularly those of us who resolutely refuse to grow up. 9/10

Paul Simpson

Click here to order Fortunately, the Milk… from Amazon.co.uk. It should arrive without travelling through multi-dimensional vortices but there are no guarantees.

 BREAKING NEWS:  New Neil Gaiman & Dirk Maggs project revealed

Check out our review of Ocean at the End of the Lane here

and Gaiman’s Doctor Who episode Nightmare in Silver here